what this feels like

For almost twelve years I've been dealing with addiction, my own, my boyfriends and now for the last four years Kevin, while I've been sober. The last two days while at work I listen to a barrage of cussing and screaming about how he's gonna fuck both of us up. Well who is the other person you ask. NO ONE!! Kevin for some reason thinks I'm sitting at work talking to people about his addiction and the problems he has. HOW FREAKING EMBARRASSING! I'm not inclined to tell people about this. We're seriously close to loosing our house and car and he just keeps relapsing he can't even begin to get a job to help me out. He couldn't hold it if he did get one. Really I just thought about what I said, relapse, I guess if you are using every week or every other week it's not really relapsing, huh? I'm about to loose my mind and can do nothing to fix our situation. I'm so sad today I can't stand it.